On the last day of 2018 after staying a couple of days exploring London, I traveled a good five-hour train ride and short bus ride to a beautiful little town in Wales called Corris where I was meant to do my residency.
I came with the inspiration to work on dance pieces which the world I live in has showed me what the real face of society was. I have seen and hated what I saw and felt on almost everyday having nearly giving up on the thought that humanity no longer exists among us humans.—I was immensely saddened and frustrated by this.
The moment I got down the train in Machynlleth, (which was just before heading to catch my bus to Corris), I have noticed humanity being alive again. Each day, and each time I get out of my studio in Maelor, I am moved by seeing people being people, and each and every person knowing what the word humanity is—I haven’t seen this in a while.
I understand that from where I have been residing for the last three years is quite a small but incredibly busy and toxic city which I hated it after a year of living there (but still living there).
When I was younger and being a journalist student, I have loved the thrill and excitement of running after each deadline and getting no sleep, running all over the place trying to balance life being a student at a university, a dance teacher, and also a professional ballet dancer in a company all at the same time —I loved the challenge, (I still do) and had dreams, perhaps just like every young ,ambitious girl wanting to be in a big city away from home. But living where I am now made me see how almost everyone has been blinded by the world around them—they (we) have been so busy and focused on the big city dreams that we literally are ignoring the people around us, and sometimes even the thought of actually living.
I think that that dream has died now.
During my time in Corris I have created several dance pieces from my realisation mostly about society and nostalgia. I am glad to have realised all of this—to see it from people of this small town that real people still do exist. And as much as I love this town, I am not really thrilled to head back to a city which technically is my home at the moment, but I guess not really what I would be calling “home”.
We may never understand how the world thinks, but we will be able to at least be familiar of it. At the moment of writing this, I am still eleven days away from heading back to London to explore a bit more (maybe live a little) and finally return to reality and suck up all the toxicity until I am about ready to leave. BUT don’t get me wrong! I do love the friends and people around me back there, and they are a big part of what keeps me sane, and I appreciate them!
A certain situation in life makes us HOW we are and WHO we are, and I guess in a city where work is the “capital” giving out intense situations in life, and getting us too occupied in our dreams and goals can sometimes make us blind by what the real life around us really is. and most importantly that we are humans who live with empathy.
Everyone of us is human, but every once in a while we forget to be one and sometimes this just ruins the whole definition of humanity, and it is just nothing but the saddest thing (next to “sorry we ran out of pizza” 😉).